Earth Science, Opinion

Updated Geologic Time Scale


The following information is published for fun and NOT for any scientific value. Please do not take any information on this page as a fact or a hypothesis. This page is created base on some funny ideas going around in Geology.

geologicTimeScale_2009_01
  • Quaternary glaciation (last ice age): resulted in Sid, Diego and their friends Zeke, Carl and others became friends with a human child.
  • Rise of human civilization; gave birth to modern day self-centered idiots who destroy the Earth.
  • For the first time aliens from the planet LV-426 probe a human female for biological experiments.
  • Biological break though in human evolution was found when a man with one nut, known as A. Hitler, was discovered when his party came to power in Germany.
  • Strong evidence suggesting our great grand parents were monkeys who butt-%#^$k came to life. The epidemic HIV/AIDS has been attributed to modern human-monkey interactions in the wild.
geologicTimeScale_2009_02
  • Due to lack of water to reduce friction during sex, dinosaurs went extinct (Cretaceous).
  • Break up of Pangaea(Jurassic) into Gondwana and Laurasia since they can’t resolve their three-way relationship problems anymore.
geologicTimeScale_2009_03
  • For the first time, large trees and shrubs were grown.
  • Opium and marijuana(Cannabis) became very popular among the micro-organisms causing “ya-man” disease.
  • Carbonated drinks during this period have lead to major teeth problems among mammal population. The acid in their coke have dissolved their teeth during Carboniferous period.
  • Landmasses fall in love creating the new marriage, Pangaea. It won’t last very long since each other have accused of cheating from the very beginning.
geologicTimeScale_2009_04
  • Moon was formed as result of aliens attacking the Earth with nukes. One of the nuke bombs hit the Earth so hard, creating the basin near Mexico.
  • Earth was sexy hot during this time; too bad with age, she became what she is today.